Oh media how you amuse me. Everytime I crawl back to you with my eager, interested tail between my legs you almost make me believe that real life is about as random and nonsensical as fantasy life. What a world I live in, where we get payed to snowboard, bears are ALWAYS described as "cuddly", and the headers in Australian news read "Brisbane man in ferry standoff asks police for a bacon and egg McMuffin".
"A Police officer said at the scene the man had requested a bacon and egg McMuffin. However, the request has been made after McDonald's 10:30am breakfast cut off time. Police said they are trying to fulfill the request" - The Courier Mail.
I would've loved to be there for the negotiation.
Man: If I don't get a bacon and egg McMuffin, I'll blow this yacht up and injure countless people!
Police: You know damn well it's past breakfast cut-off time, it's beyond our ability to come through on that promise!
I mean, really? I worked at McDonalds and, in a life and death situation, it's not that hard to get the stuff all out and make one for special order. You're acting like he asked you to rig the academy awards so that Kevin Costner wins best Actor for his previous performance in "Waterworld".
In all seriousness this guy is the perfect example of a Maverick. First of all, he doesn't play by anyones rules. The most obvious of which is criminal law. You'll also notice that convention has no place in this guys daily routine. Another man who completely shuns his schedule. He's on a yacht with a jerry can and a bayonet (classic maverick combo), asking for a McMuffin, when it's clearly past breakfast cut off time and he know's it. I'm assuming, being the Maverick that he is, he actually waited for it to be taken OFF the menu before asking for it simply because he shuns any sort of regularity; in this case, a menu.
Today I have been delivered the perfect combination of fast food and improvised weaponry. Thank you news media, you just macced my day :)
No comments:
Post a Comment